The end of one. . .

His body grows cold in my hands. I hold him close, eyes closed tight. Afraid to let go. Afraid to loose whats already lost. Slowly, his body lightens, begins to fade. No! You can't leave! Please! Don't leave!!! Please. Please. I don't want to be alone.

Its gone. Its all gone and I'm alone again. I pull my legs in tight, bury my face in my arms. I can feel the warmth of my legs against my chest, the icy cold of the void on my back, the horrible tight pain around my heart.

Alone I drift. I don't want to sleep. To dream. To see my love in my mind again, only to have him ripped away from my when I wake, wrenching open wounds anew. But I do, and it hurts.

Time passes. I have no way of knowing how much. But as it does, the pain and loss become a part of me. Slowly, reluctantly, I lift my head from my arms and stare into the void.

I try and remember the world as it was. The city, the streets, my home, my life. I try and return world as it was, but I can't. The skys are always dark. The cities grey and colorless. The people listless, empty husks.

Remeber the good times. Remember the love, the joy, the wonder. I force myself to see teh color. The sky will be blue. The night will come but dawn will follow. I make the world live again. But still, the people are husks. The spark that fuels the horrors and beauties of the world is gone. They are all as dead as I feel.

I let it all fade. I return to the comforting familiartity of the void, and remember. Our, my, wedding photos are before me. The are as brittle as burnt paper, falling to ash with the slightest touch, as fragile as my memories.

I remember our annaversary. I hold a frame in my hand. The once brilliant frame now rusted, tarnished, but the picture within is clear. We are together on the beach, the sun setting before us. I remember that night so clearly. The words he said. The truth of who he was, of what he suffered and why he chose the mortal coil.

I close my eyes, and remember words that were never said. I remember the things he wanted to say but couldn't. I remember the love he had lost. I remember the woman he lost so very long ago. I remember the loneliness and the suffering. I remember the eternities that he waited for her to return.

My eyes open to the void. I will find you again my love, but until that day I will be strong. With the surety of one who has seen eternity I speak into the void. Let there be light.

But what if it doesn't?

A groan escapes my lips. So tired. So cold. There are people around me. Lights. Sirens. Someone is yelling. A man, kneeling over me. A mask to my mouth. What is happening? Where am I? Birthday. My sons birthday. Forgot the candles. Was coming back from the store when. . . did I get hit?

The man, the paramedic? He's saying something. To someone. Can't think. So tired. So sore. Just want to sleep. Just for a minute. Darkness. Quiet.

My eyes open. I can see more clearly now. I shudder. No, not me. The bed. Yes, I'm on a bed. It's moving. There are people around me still. They look confused. Someone is getting up. A woman says something. A question. "What happened?" A man, he's getting up. A bruise on his head. He fell? He looks at me, confused. "We were at a hit and run. He" the man nods at me "suffered a concussion. Shatter glass deep in his chest. Was trying to keep him conscious and then, then . ." he trails off.

The others look around at each other. One says he was on his way to work. Another said she was having lunch, then heard a page. The woman, the first, shakes her head. Says she remembers, sort off. I start to move again.

My eyes are heavy. I want to say something, but can only groan. My vision blurs. Someone, the man who fell, shouts something. Stay with him. Stay awake. Awake. Why? I'm tired. Just let me sleep.

My eyes open again. There is a pain in my chest. People are around me. Doctors. Nurses. They have blood on their hands. They stand still, dazed for a few seconds. The doctor recovers first. Why does he sound nervous? Something about too deep. Can't do anything. Whats to deep? My son. Its his birthday. I grab his arm. I tell him I have to go. Can't be late. Need the candles.

At least, I try to. I cough. Something wet. Tastes like iron. A nurse wipes my mouth. The cloth comes away red. The people leave. All but one. She begins to clean. She doesn't look at me.

I stare at the ceiling. I try to think, but its so hard. Something is wrong. The world blurs. People come talk, and leave. I'm moved. More people come. My hand is held. Someone is saying something. Someone important. I see the face. She's sad. There is a boy. My heart aches, but why? I reach. My arm trembles. My vision blurs. I want to sleep. It grows dark. Sleep. I want to sleep. I want to. . NO!!!

I force my eyes open. I force my self to see. The woman, my wife, my love, my world, on my left. On my right my son, my. . . My son? Where is my son? My heart races. The pain in my head explodes. Where is he? No! No no no!!!!

My eyes sting. I have to get up. I have to see him. I have to see. . . someone. I feel hands on my head. Steadying me. I see eyes. Bright, clear green eyes, rimmed with tears. The eyes of my love.

My breathing hurts. Its getting harder and harder to take each breath. She's saying words to me. The words are meaningless to me, but they are important. I can feel myself drifting away. I can feel the end, but I cling to the sound of her voice, the smell of her breathe.

The world is fading. There are screams from out side my room. The lights go dark. From the corner of my eye, through the door to my room, I see people running, the hallway crumbling into darkness. The walls of my room peel away. My love steps off the floor as it falls into darkness. I hold her in my sight, in my mind. I can feel all other thoughts fail, but I will not loose her.

My mind is gone, my body is gone, but my love is eternal. My last breath I give to her. My world will go on without me.